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Writer's pictureChanti Niven

How Your Child Can Stand Up to Bullies And Be More Popular

Updated: Oct 22, 2023




How your child can learn to stand up to bullies
Bullying Destroys Lives



The Power of Communication To Deter Bullies:

He never told me what was happening at school. I saw the bruises on his legs and when I asked him about them, he always had an explanation. He had fallen down or bumped into things. One thing he never did was complain but I could tell he was not happy at school. I would pick him up and watch as he walked, dragging his backpack, head down and shoulders stopped. I nagged him about not taking care of his backpack but it made no difference. I could tell he was depressed but did not know what was making him depressed. I thought I had a good relationship with all three of my kids but my girls were definitely more open about their feelings. My son was more reticent to talk about his day-to-day experiences.


One day when I picked him up from school, he was not where he was supposed to meet me and I parked my car and went looking for him. What I saw that day absolutely broke my heart. I can tell you that as a parent, I had some violent thoughts when I watched the boys pushing him around and mocking him. I yelled and they scattered. I tried gathering my son into my arms but he pushed me away angrily. I later found out that kids would put rocks in their long socks and use these to beat him around the legs. Kids can be so cruel, can’t they? My approach was to tell my son to report the bullying to the teacher or even Principal. His dad said, “Next time they try to hurt you, punch them in the nose or neck…like this!” (He demonstrated) I was horrified. How can teaching your child to respond violently help the problem?


Bullying in schools is a pervasive issue that affects countless students every day. But did you know that one of the most potent weapons against bullying isn’t just about intervention after it happens? It’s about proactive prevention through improved communication. In this blog post, we share how enhancing communication skills can be a total game-changer in preventing bullying at school. Violence only begets more violence and sets off a vicious cycle that is hard to stop.


The Bullying Epidemic

Bullying is like a silent storm that brews in the hallways and playgrounds, leaving scars that often go unnoticed until it’s too late. The consequences can be devastating, affecting a child’s self-esteem, mental health, and overall well-being. But what if we could stop the storm before it even starts?

The Role of Communication

Communication is at the heart of every human interaction. When it comes to bullying prevention, effective communication can work wonders. Here’s how:

  1. Encouraging Open Dialogue: Creating a safe space where students feel comfortable talking about their experiences, fears, and concerns is crucial. When kids know they can openly discuss their problems, they are more likely to seek help if they’re being bullied or if they witness bullying.

  2. Building Empathy: Good communication involves listening as much as speaking. By teaching kids to actively listen and empathize with others, they gain a better understanding of the emotional impact of their words and actions. This can deter hurtful behavior.

  3. Promoting Inclusivity: Effective communication fosters a sense of belonging. When students communicate inclusively, they create a school culture where everyone feels accepted and valued, reducing the likelihood of ostracism and exclusion that can lead to bullying.

  4. Empowering Bystanders: Bystanders play a significant role in preventing bullying. Teaching kids to speak up when they witness bullying can make a huge difference. Effective communication skills help them feel confident in reporting incidents to teachers or school authorities.

  5. Conflict Resolution: Conflicts are a part of life, but communication can help resolve them peacefully. When students are equipped with conflict resolution skills, they are less likely to resort to bullying as a means of resolving disputes.

Putting Communication into Practice

So, how can we empower our kids with better communication skills to prevent bullying? Here are some practical steps:

  • Teach Active Listening: Encourage kids to actively listen to their peers, parents, and teachers. Listening fosters understanding and empathy.

  • Promote Emotional Expression: Create an environment where kids feel safe expressing their emotions. Encourage them to share their feelings and experiences with trusted adults.

  • Role-Playing: Engage in role-playing scenarios that involve conflict resolution and standing up against bullying. This helps kids practice assertive communication. Teach them how to use their voice to deescalate heightened emotions.

  • Empathy-Building Activities: Incorporate empathy-building activities into the curriculum. These can include storytelling, discussions, or community service projects.

  • Foster a Culture of Kindness: Encourage acts of kindness and reinforce the importance of treating others with respect. Small gestures can go a long way in preventing bullying.

If you feel like your child is in real physical danger, consider enrolling your child in a self-defense class but do not neglect developing these all-important communication skills. These wills tand them in good stead for the rest of their lives. Now, I am sure many reading this will have some skepticism but let me assure you that we have seen bullying all but disappear in the schools we have taught our program in. In one of our testimonial videos, a teacher says, “You didn’t say a word about bullying but bullying completely stopped after you spent eight weeks with the kids!” I believe this is because we taught them better ways to deal with their emotions. When it comes to kids who are generally bullied, their fear makes them an easy target. Teaching these skills builds confidence and confidence is one of the greatest weapons in their arsenal.


Improved communication is a powerful tool in preventing bullying at school. By teaching our kids the value of open dialogue, empathy, and conflict resolution, we can create a school environment where bullying has no place to thrive. Let’s agree to work together to stop the storm before it even begins and ensure that every child feels safe, valued, and heard. #ParentingTips


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